having a baby with a woman you don't love

My father married my mother when she became pregnant times were different then of course. Single. That's what we tackle in today's blog. I completely respect her decision on this. You could be the best, healthiest, most well adjusted person. We work hard to share our most timely and active conversations with you. If you break up right away, she can take the kid and you may miss a lot of the firsts w/them growing up. You said you quit your job Is that because of the pregnancy? If someone truly needs GA, that's absolutely what it's for. We can and should celebrate those things while also giving our love and support to those who are struggling to get there, and to those who don't want any part of that scene, ever. 15) His biological clock is ticking. I don't have any memories of them not fighting. In the end its all about the kids. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. You don't even love him. THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. Only good thing that came out of it are my children. SCENARIO 2: STAY WITH THE PERSON YOU LOVE. Does he still love me? You will need to know on how to get a Taurus man make a decision due to your current situation. I got pregnant with a 34 year old man with another baby and I'm only 19 we've know each other 3 months now but only knew each other a couple weeks when we found out. Thank you for purchase! Can't and haven't said a word to anyone about how i feel. My eldest is 3 then one nearly 2 and one due any time, we dont fight too much but dont love each other, dont even like each other, I just dont want the kids not to have family days and stuff? You need to be upfront and honest nothing is worse than being lied to when feelings are involved. Then suddenly she is all happy, and loved up which I find really hard to believe. Personally I think if you both have similar life views (finances, rearing children, religion) then I think you could make this a long lasting beautiful relationship and your child can grow up in a loving home with mom and dad. *I also grew up in a home where my parents were unhappy. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. Opinions please. Welcome! the woman would be unhappy, miserable and resentful as well in the long run for marrying a man who doesnt love her or care if she exists. A Group Owner is a member that has initiated the creation of a group to connect with other members to share their journey through the same pregnancy & baby stages. It tears me apart. cos no parents will watch their daughter to be ignore by a guy whom impregnated her\.. and am not even sure de gurl will accept that U must learn how to love her love grows strongly if u give it a chance.. give that a try ok without causin her much pain. That is exactly how I feel about my life over the past 8 years - it feels like I have been sleepwalking. You CAN NOT let someone have the upper hand on you. :(. Every toddler boy I've ever met has a destructive streak I am just not into. A. They were always fighting. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. my point is no one really wins in this situation. I hated the way I felt with him. 37 weeks today. I have a good job with good income and will pay half of the costs, I didn't want to lose her but I did. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. I'm sorry this is long but I have no one else. go and apologise. you have a baby with a girl you dont love,but you loved her apple enough to eat it without any protection?stupid talk,absolute rubbish. Birth control, as the objection went, could actually serve to raise the abortion rate by encouraging people not ready to have children to have sex at the risk, however small, of becoming. A friend of mine just had a kid w/ someone 1-2 weeks before meeting his current GF (who he loves but is probably leaving him over this - who can blame her?) In other words, those maternal. Don't stay just for the kids. Having a complex relationship that involves a baby mama means you have to include the other woman in your life; whether you like it or not. WTF re u saying tat u will nt marry her if I was tat gal u will marry by force so tat when u die n return u will fu*k people that u love total rubbish.Now u want freedom my ass u wont get so whos gonna to marry ur baby mommy?? For all the guys out there who think a woman is the stepping stone to the next onewear a condom. Are these issues still there? I love my daughter and i care about my wife but there is no love on my end. Do not be with someone you don't want to be with. As I said earlier, each person has different needs. It does make someone feel down and stressed out but, look at the big picture. Learn more about. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. Anyway, if you don't want to be with her, make that very clear. 2) Are you prepared to forego this child and create a loving family with someone you truly love (which means you will wait for this new love to bear you a child).but be completely guilty all your life to abandon your first newborn just because you dont love your girlfriend. I grew up where my dad treated me like ****, so I wanted to be the best father I could. This may not change her decision, but best to be honest. If you don't like something about your life, MAKE A CHANGE. Second thing that you can do after having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it is to be responsible. There are reasons on why you should never date a pothead. He's not all bad. We only dated for three months before I got pregnant. The transition from being a couple to having a baby and becoming parents is an exciting, empowering, and life-changing experience. Please I need your help because I might be pushed to get married when am not prepared. In order to fully understand why I've come to this conclusion on why men stop wanting sex with women they're in a relationship with, it's important to understand every part of the reality dose . (5 kg) or more a year after giving birth, Live Science previously reported. Note that once you confirm, this action cannot be undone. I'm a **** if I lie and say I love her and be with her. Op: get a job and support yourself. advice needed h heatha_heatha Posted 2/4/14 My boyfriend and I have only been together since November. THE MOTHER KNOWS THE FATHER DOESNT LOVE HER NOW GUESS WHAT SHE IS ALSO MISARABLE! It was important to me that my children had as normal upbringing as possible. I got my, now wife, pregnant but she never loved me, in fact a month before she got pregnant she actually went to spend the night with some dude at a hotel in a different city, but she told me she just wanted to go away for a couple of days. @jessi, LMFAOI like ur commentVery BLUNT and to the POINT. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. He just has a side I don't like. She is 6 months pregnant now. (11 Possible Meanings), how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby, reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else, How to Sweep A Cancer Man Off His Feet - Zodiac Signs, 32 Best Reasons to Date a Nurse (The No.1 Caretaker), Things You Need to Know About Dating Portuguese Man (The Sexiest Boyfriend), 35 Crazy and Undeniable Signs That She Friendzoned You, 25 Reasons Why You Should Date The Outgoing Introvert, Reasons to Choose the Girl with the Complicated Pastand How to Love Her Right. Adults with kids don't need someone else to financially support them. Send all yourrelationship&Loveproblems/issues to me for help via [emailprotected]. Sorry to say this, but your gf cannot be trusted. IS THAT WHAT SHE/HER DESERVES A GARANTEED **** UP ENVRIOMENT? 1.) On the most basic level, these changes, prompted by a flood of hormones during pregnancy and in the postpartum period, help attract a new mother to her baby. Most were married to . If I could take a pill that made me love u him I would, whereas I think he thinks he can start a new life if he left me? I know some people may be asking why having sex with someone you dont love. My boyfriend and I have only been together since November we had protected sex twice, in December, and I got pregnant. And beware if your list of reasons is merely a hollow echo of your partner's. 3. A year has passed, we have a beautiful little girl that I love with all my heart, but our marriage life is a disaster. We made it to 8yrs. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. Life will not be easier staying with him. They were always fighting, unhappy. He's controlling. But I want to be a father. If I do something to hurt their father then im hurting my children because they love him. I even feel guilty saying this considering how hard other couples are trying to have a child and can't. Copyright 2017 - 2022 by LoveDevani.com. I make significantly more income then her, so I know she will need the child support, which will at least allow me to be in my child's life, but I don't want my child to be exposed to an unhappy marriage. I think it's best to do what will make you the happiest. But that luxury comes with an expiration date, especially for women. There is no right way to be a parent there is the only way that you want to do it. 37 weeks today. Satisfaction can be found through bringing up children . If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. I don't know if this is pregnancy hormones (I am only 5 weeks) or if I really feel this way. You do make a lot of sense and i guess this is the only way forward. How can you discuss your thoughts with her in a healthy way? And the same with me. To allow yourself to stay in a toxic relationship will be useless. Its been almost 5yrs. Broken heart is a usual thing but, what is bad is the action that people choose to take to heal the broken heart itself. And remember, folks who don't want kids don't want kids. Don't get me wrong here, my daughter can destroy with the best of them. If I could do something different, it would be to divorce as soon as my last daughter was born. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. And if your parents think you guys are in love Then how does that work? Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. Second, if she were to make that decision previously to have an abortion for whatever reason you are not someone whose opinion matters since you're on an Internet forum and you don't know the personal lives of anyone on here enough to dictate that they should never have an abortion. Sheffield Utd X Tottenham - Ao Vivo Grtis HD Sem Travar | Futebol Grtis HD. But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . Now i have sleepless nights trying to find an angle but without success. I know she doesn't want to be with me and I stop loving her and I don't want to be with her anymore. General Baby Shower Wishes And Congratulations. I have read many times that people say don't make any major changes in the baby's first year of life. I think it's so hard for me to love this baby because I don't love my partner. Remember, the decision you make will decide whether you will be happy or not in the near future. Be responsible of your act and decision on something. We broke up 6 weeks ago and we Ok long story short my girlfriend of over a year was raped by someone that My girlfriend doesn't think I love her, but I do love her. On the other hand, if you do not love her but only want the child, it is also very selfish of you. "People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner,'" he says. There are days I hate being pregnant and days I could swear I even hate him. Might not happen overnight but think of where you want to see yourself in a year. I've made my OWN money since I was 15 years old and before I quit my job to MOVE Paid for all my own stuff and bills WITHOUT his help. Be mature about it don't depend on her to be safe you be safe, if she don't comply then don't have sex! He is capable of choosing to be with you and not having a child with you, or leaving if he decides he wants a child more. Same boat. Good one boys real mature!! In November 2022, I gave birth to my precious baby girl. You will need to end an unwanted relationship. The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. Tell her at home and in private. I find the really difficult and I just have idea what do. Dont ever sleep with any girl you are not sure abt. It's no one else's responsibility to support you. @jessi, how come i never get to meet these kind of guys,i swear i would have cut off your stupid sausage,put in the toilet and flush it off nonsence, @jessi, maame plz its rude to cut sumones sausage.sincerely the fault might come from the gal,maybe she did self arrangement ahohyehy3.and resulted in the pregnancy. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. Long story as short as possible! Amazed how women can be on these forums. Cookie Notice People reports the famous couple's "miracle baby"-a daughter-was born Wednesday, Nov. 7, via surrogate. I try to act normal as Bella and I sit here talking, even though I'm feeling abnormally attracted to her even . They finally divorced when I was 19. My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. Long story short my ex dumped me. What are the reasons for not wanting to be with her? But, learning from the past and making it as a lesson is a different story. I'm Michelle Devani and would like to take this opportunity to welcome you to my site. I didn't want to end up starting a family in my 50s. To not make the problem goes worse, be responsible for your unwanted partner and the baby. Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. Just not with her. !So the next time you wake up and look at the zit face woman you married that disgusts you and you hate her because you could have banged all the women you wanted but she got knocked up! When I did he the. Know theways to move on after a bad relationship to help you to get better. Life is beautiful but you don't have a clue Sun and ocean blue Their magnificence, it don't make sense to you Black beauty, oh oh oh Black beauty, oh oh oh I paint the house black My wedding dress black leather too You have no room for light Love is lost on you I keep my lips red To seem like cherries in the spring Darling, you can't let everything I am trying REALLY hard to find some common ground with him, to love him, or even like him but the more time goes on the more miserable I am. At least you know your decision to not hook up with a guy was definitely the right one if he insults you for it. That doesn't mean you give up your relationship w/the child, you will have to share custody, and likely pay support (unless you have the kid more than she does, but that's rare). SCENARIO 3: FORGET ABOUT THE WOMAN YOU LOVE. My youngest doesn't really remember anything. OK LETS TRY TO LOOK AT WHAT IS: IS ANYONE THINKING ABOUT THIS FROM THE CHILD PERSPECTIVE? Congratulations, a new bundle of joy is coming to fill your home with love and bliss. It was very stressful. All rights reserved. It would not work out for you or for her. A cesarean birth, which accounts for 21% of births today, costs around. but honestly did society really win? Can you be responsible enough to make sure you are being safe? !I've been married for ten long miserable years to a wife I never loved. Is it okay for you to feel down all the time thinking about the mistake you did? It wasn't ideal but eventually I got a better job and bought myself a nice car. Subscribe to Medium for only $5/month & read ALL my sizzling hot stories! Told me "**** the baby" I was gone for a while after that but went back due to having no where else to go. Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. What was even worst she call me two days later to ask me if I could pick her up and I did. We didn't have to be. THEN, MAYBE THEY BREAK UP CUZ THEY CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. If thats all he wants, he will be gone. We are two total opposite people. At the end of the day, you won't be able to find happiness that you have been looking for. It happens almost all the time that children involved in such situations rather suffer the consequencies. My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has 35 weeks - desperate to getto finish line ?? I know things would be going so much smoother in my life if I wasn't preggo but there hasn't been a day I questioned my love for this baby. If you're still contemplating having a family, you're still young enough to have that luxury. I know that my kids love us both. THE CHILD WILL HAVE MOTHER AND FATHER TOGETHER. Man and woman making love in bed. Take a time to learn from your mistake so that you won't fall into the same problem. Sometimes it feels like you just can't win. Well of course he would keep the car. AND THIS ALSO INCLUDES AN UNHAPPY CHILD. not the father, mother or child. dont do it I married my ex for the same reasons it was terrible for not only us but my children. This after-pregnancy condition is common, with roughly 70 to 80 percent of new mamas experiencing some degree of sadness. Only knowing that you don't feel good with your current situation won't make any change unless you do. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. U dont love her bcos u havent made ur mind to do so the moment u sit down to think about this gurl as a grown man n de future, am sure u start developin love for her and am sure u liked her thats why u slept with her what makes u slept with her?? Many things will change during the whole 9 months of pregnancy. If you don't want a baby, then you won't be having one. On the contrary, women have been forced to marry men they didn't love for centuries. Good luck to you. Americans love coffee. You should have your own baby feelings figured out. My girlfriend is pregnant and suddenly i realize that she may not be all i ever wanted. When we found out this baby is a boy, the feeling of disconnection multiplied; I know this baby is going to be like his daddy. Be strong. Lastly, keeping a child she wanted to abort could cause her to hate the child, it's not guaranteed she would love the child when it was born. I My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. In some cases it works, but for many it doesn't. Why would you do that? THIS IS THE ENVIROMENT IN THIS SITUATION. As a matter of fact, there are many mental, emotional, and social side effects associated with being a young-faced woman. I do have family but financially they can't help me or buy me a car bc he would be petty enough to keep the one he got me, it's under his name, I don't have anywhere to go or any Finances since I quit my job moving in with him. I do love her a lot as a person but i am not in love with her. Probably. I would be too miserable too even think of looking at other women. Noooo you have to marry and then spend the rest of your lives in hell with someone you slept with? Married for few months. well you could say society won because it was able to force a marriage albeit a miserable one. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window), New Music Video: 'Badman Badgirl' By Becca Feat. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. Wear a condom, or allow some woman to own your future (and your money) for a couple decades of your life! He's provided for me financially, has given me a house and a car, and is really into being a father. Oh, I agree 100%. Good luck. Help :(. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. The dilemma I have a female colleague who has, over the past three years, told me she loves me and would like to marry me.The problem is that I do not love her and I have told her that. Know his concern about the current situation and discuss. form is an illusion. I'm supposed to get married in a month. Ex gf keeps driving past my house!!? As to my ex yes she is into me, we where together for over 9 years, this current relationship is just 10 months old! Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. Get a job and find a place to live. SHE DESERVES A SAYING IN THIS! I don't know what to do. Will you make a better progress by doing so? Chosing to be in a rebound relationship to forget the past and aiming for some fun also cause a problem. Having a baby is a life-changing experience and many want to ensure they do it at a time that is right for them. I am a single mom and have been for a few years- however, my first child was planned with my fiance' and we were madly in love and it was the greatest, happiest time of my life. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. He's not all bad. DO YOU WANT TO CHILD TO HAVE A MESSED UP UPBRINGING LIKE YOU DID? I want to leave my 4 months pregnant girlfriend !! K lemme get one thing straight. Everyone is happier. Couldn't have said it any better And me too guys. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. YES PRO-LIFE HOWEVER THINK ABOUT IT THIS WAY COULD YOU PROVIDE THE BEST FOR THE CHILD? I dont think Ill be at peace with her in marriage. I honestly could not ever think of missing out on this child's growing up, especially the early stages. She's told me I'll get to see the kid and stuff but she doesn't want me in her life anymore because I make her too unhappy. marriage should not be a punishment or a form of contract. No going back. if she wants to put kid in day care every day, she can and you pay for it). I would rather someone abort a child they don't want than to have the child and it end up neglected and in the system as it got older. But we started fighting more and more. 1997-2023 BabyCenter, LLC, a Ziff Davis company. Paula Perry has a multi-page spreadsheet titled "Squirrels," which details the health and wellness of tiny, injured baby squirrels she keeps in her house. It is tough to find time for yourself, let alone your spouse. How can I believe I fathered the child if she's been unfaithful ? After a wonderful pregnancy I spontaneously gave birth at 29 weeks. No need to waste time your life and time on him. Your post will be hidden and deleted by moderators. We've been together 9. It was enough for me to be content, while I gave the kids a life that I never had. Sex is the leading cause of babies. She will touch you in a gentle way, kiss you softly and hug you with her heart. I want to be a father!!! You would [hopefully] love your child, while also realizing that you shouldn't be having sex with anyone that you don't want to have a baby with. Group Owners uphold the core values of the brand by reporting content that violates the community guidelines. It has been the hardest most brutal experience of my life. Even when you first meet your new child, don't put expectations on how you should feel. If you just dont see it working it is better to do it now. The baby grew in her, she birthed it, she fed it, and she nurtured it every step of the way. We found out. Forgotting that there's gonna be 3 children in his life forever? Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. I know life would be so much easier if we were together, but I don't know if it's worth it. Tist: THAT'S IT. I really don't want to mess this child's life up. I don't get how you came to that conclusion and you are just a bitter girl that Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. They had to do it because the marriage was arranged or demanded, as their families saw them as a burden and financial responsibility to be passed on to a man who was willing to take her off their hands. there will be hatred, resentment, and misery. I am planning to sit tight for now and make sure i am there for her and the child when it comes along. As such, you'll need to spend time with both his child's mom and his child. I didn't want to waste one more day of my life feeling empty and with someone I didn't even like. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). Its best to rip the band-aid off now instead of living a miserable life indefinitely. My partner works alot which I think is the cause of us not having any connection? sit the lady down n explain things to her and the most important thing is take very good care of your child. We provide resources that help you in your relationship, marriage, and dating life. Does it feels good to fake your feelings? I tried to make myself love him. This is why friends with benefits is never a good idea. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. My greatest concern is the child. I FEEL SORRY FOR THE GIRL INVOLVED. It's not that they don't want to. I do not know the answer to that. AS to your ex, is she still into you, or is it one-sided? I feel bad for you but you basically gave him the green light to control you. Adoption is for some people who want to unselfishly make sure the child is cared for and loved by people who can support it just like toughing it out and having the child, supporting it, and loving it is for others. Have you told him you're pregnant yet? He will probably try to then use the baby against you. I just put myself on hold. Don't feel guilty if you're not in a constant state of love and bliss when you have a new baby. You should do what will make you happy. Apply for wic and food stamps and move in with family. Immerse yourself in nature. I sacraficed my needs for them. And if you guys were just friends with benefits, why continue the pregnancy? Don't assume the baby will be just like his daddy, your baby may have a few similarities to him cause he's his child but your baby will be one of a kind in your eyes. He nearly killed you. Spend time with like-minded people who love and respect your choices. hmmmm my advise to u is to pray to God n ask for forgiveness, i wonder the big talk u used on this gal b4 u got her on bed and now ur running frm ur responsibility. (1 to 2 kg . Everybody deserves someone who is able to appreciate, respect, and love themselves. Sorry for the long story, but I wanted to give you an example of how the other side of things could go. 4. So, we got married. Ex GIrlfriend blocked me out of the blue! useless boy!! It may be tolerable now, but it sounds like you are unhappy. Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. I was By entering this site you declare A woman isn't damaged after engaging in sex, having a baby, or ending a bad relationship. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? CLICK HERE to subscribe to our daily up-to-date news!! Just not with her. This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. You are right it is not fair to her. He shdnt forget the welfare of the child involved. Eight women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s spoke to Insider about their decision to be child-free. Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. She has someone who depends solely on her. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. Having a baby can create a bond that encourages mature personal growth and strengthens a couple's commitment to each other -- but that doesn't happen overnight, and more often, it doesn't. Welcoming your new baby with wishes of health, joy and plenty of sleep. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think. A baby doesn't get to choose who his parents are so I think if you feel you won't be able to love your baby, it would be best for the both of y'all to be open to adoption. not truly in love with the gf), then you can break up. Just that simple. A Group Owner is a member that has initiated the creation of a group to connect with other members to share their journey through the same pregnancy & baby stages. Why can't you go back to doing what you were doing before you met? I feel like I'm forcing myself to love her. "We are. Trust me dude, do whatever you have to to end this A.S.A.P.

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